The gods are merciful
Let me tell you a story. When I was a young man at the ripe age of 19 or so, I got 1:05 Surface 1 agent. At the time it was a WR that wasn’t *too* terribly common just yet. I had spent about 20 hours over the course of one weekend working on it. I had amassed 39 1:06 runs and deemed this the greatest crime against probability in history. When I saw 1:05 on the screen I wanted to weep. That’s how draining the experience was, lol.
Now, consider that Wouter has amassed a total of 540 completed 54s on Dam agent. That’s 539 more 54s than what I have. That’s over 500 more completions than what I endured for my most painful campaign ever. This guy’s determination and commitment are absolutely peerless.. If you haven’t been around the Elite neighborhood in a few days, then I’m proud to be the first to tell you that Wouter finally did it. He got 53.
L337 Story Generator
Hey guys, I got something for you to waste a few minutes on. As part of my ongoing JavaScript kick, I bring to you the L337 Story Generator! After giving the program a few simple specifications it generates a random story, that *hopefully*, is of comedic value. So have a look and try making a few stories. And knowing that the majority of you are computer-savvy losers like me, I encourage you to follow the “About this program” link to learn a little more about how I wrote it and other approaches I considered.
The next update I plan to bring to you is Fake Chat 4, but bear with me — finals are bearing down on me….
Leet Mention
Thanks to the ingenuity of Logan West and his Ultimate Nintendo Console, the-elite.net found itself in the pages of a UK gaming magazine. Click the picture to enlarge and read the story (located in the right column; quality reduced heavily to conserve bandwidth).
Thanks to Tom Gaffikin for providing the scan.
A shocker from Sweden
Dam agent…where it all starts. So simple, so …boring. Naturally we had to make it the most* overplayed, contentious, record in GoldenEye
“Dark LTK” specialist, Ilari Pekkala, has just elevated his name to the forefront of latterday GE greats. Known for his peerless performance in a genre of GE competition that he brought to popularity, Dark LTK (007 settings maxed for greatest difficulty), “Illu” has shown that he’s much more than a GE mastermind and/or GE sharpshooting specialist. No, Ilari is a complete GE player. Why? You guessed it. Ilari just got Dam 0:53.
The Elite regulars know that this is much more than a gaming accomplishment. Dam 0:53 is a piece of GoldenEye lore, shrouded in controversy. What are the PAL/NTSC differences? How and where should look-down be used? How much of it is random? How many 54s does Wouter have currently? And a question many here differ on, did Dan Berube actually get 0:53? Under the assumption he did, “Illu” is just the 3rd player to achieve the milestone. And this time there’s no controversy. You can watch video proof of the claim. The score was achieved with NTSC gaming equipment on PAL recording equipment, which explains poor video quality. Impressively, one boost and silky smooth strafing was enough. It’s also interesting to note that he used “look-up” on the final portion of the mission, embracing the logic of lookdown–increasing the frame rate by looking away from anything graphically complex.
In closing, congratulations to Ilari; no one will ever again misjudge the difficulty of this or any of the Elite modern records. For those unfamiliar to the idiosyncracies of Dam agent, I simply say this: you think you know…but trust me, you don’t :rolleyes:
* – “most” is subjective; hopefully certain people will not stress over my word choice like usual.
The beat goes on
*beats Greg Woll to death*
…whoops, wrong beat! Let’s get back on track. As you saw if you’ve been following PD lately, there was the first Player of the Month voting in a while a few days back, and now I’m here to make good on the deal. Check out October’s POM! Two old months were also decided, although they have not yet been given full text writeups. Staying on the topic of updated pages, you might also want to see the latest Rare Ranks. There’s been a big move of GEers over to PD lately, so if there’s more new eligiable players, tell me about it. (But remember, under the new system you must be Top 100, both pts AND time, both games). Thirdly, check out the newly re-HTMLed News Archive, which Come was kind enough to fix up for us. Browsing our site’s history should be much easier on the eyes thanks to his efforts.
And finally, you may remember that our official 500,000th visitor was promised a cookie. Well, one man came forward to claim the prize (and even backed it up with pic proof, in true Elite fashion!). Here is his reward, which he has our permission to display with pride on his own website. Way to go!
More fine-tuning
With some assistance from Come and Beau West, the-elite.net is now fully valid HTML 4.01 Transitional! I also went through and changed around file types of the various images being hosted on the page and took 110 KB off the index alone, wow! Looks like the-elite.net is primed and ready to resume with renewed durability and a renewed identity.
Go Elite! 
