Chapter 2: The Birth of Legends
c. late 1997 A.D.
"And so the chat would continue and our hero would soon be subjected
to a few more unforeseen perils. How will he handle them? Would
he greet these new challenges with understanding, or suffer them with doubt,
suspicion, and bitter intransigence? A little bit of each, really.
For soon his world would be changed forever, his mental fortitude tested
by the doings of a few unlikely legends."
Sterlin18 has entered the room.
Sterlin18: Your the Goldeneye dude, right?
WesMcKinn: Depends. With hesitance I answer, “yes”.
Sterlin18: k. just wanted to join your site
WesMcKinn: The World GoldenEye Rankings? Or the one about Pogs?
Sterlin18: yea the first one
WesMcKinn: Damn! The Pog site will have its day….
Sterlin18: why isnt it called “The GoldenEye World Rankings” tho?
WesMcKinn: Because of some obscure grammar technicality about ordering adjectives that I researched before you were even born.
WesMcKinn: Is there a reason you’re here?
Sterlin18: o, well I was wonderring the same about you cuz like..you were here alone when I came?
WesMcKinn:…just answer the question
WesMcKinn: Why are you here?
Sterlin18: i told you bro…i want to join the GWR
WesMcKinn: Just email me then, to the address listed on the site.
Sterlin18: well I did but you replied and said I was dum for trying to lie and stuff but my times are for real dude.
WesMcKinn: And why should I believe you?
Sterlin18: because they are real
WesMcKinn: Good rebuttal.
Sterlin18: im from america (mass.)…
Sterlin18: and i speak english
WesMcKinn: Oh do you? I was trying to decide what that was….
WesMcKinn: So you’re from Massachusetts?
WesMcKinn: Well, lots of good, white, trust-worthy English speaking people from there…
WesMcKinn: Resend your times and I’ll reconsider.
Sterlin18: you can go here to see them acually
Sterlin18: so can I join?
Sterlin18: Are you there?
WesMcKinn: Sorry, I was just trying to let the hilarity wash over me
WesMcKinn: I needed a laugh, thank you. Nice "times".
Sterlin18: can i join
StevenZwartjes has entered the room.
Wessels has entered the room.
WesMcKinn: What’s this all about?
PaperBoy006 has entered the room.
WesMcKinn: Um, hi, who are you guys?
Wessels: We are the Dutch.
WesMcKinn: So that means you are from …Holland. No Denmark is it?
Wessels: The Netherlands.
Sterlin18: haha dude both youre guesses were wrong
PaperBoy006: I am multiplayers!
WesMcKinn: What? Why are you guys here?
Wessels: We would like to join your Goldeneye page.
WesMcKinn: Okay, sure. Got any good times?
Wessels: Yea, I got some fast times, Eise too, but Steven is really good.
PaperBoy006: he is not the lead dog tho!
StevenZwartjes: Yes I am.
WesMcKinn: What are you laughing at, Sterling?
WesMcKinn: Ok, ok, well anyway, how good is Steven?
Wessels: His times are here
WesMcKinn: k, hold on.
Sterlin18: Eisi your crazy
PaperBoy006: who r u?
Sterlin18: Sterling Neblett
PaperBoy006: hahah :) :) :)
PaperBoy006: I never heard of you sterling !
WesMcKinn: I think Steven’s times are um…highly suspicious.
WesMcKinn: 0:25 Runway agent?
WesMcKinn: 0:32 took me TWO HOURS.
StevenZwartjes: It’s real.
Wessels: Yes, I’ve seen him get it more than once.
WesMcKinn: So you guys know each other?
PaperBoy006: Steven is win!!
StevenZwartjes: Yes. ...and yes.
Hbk320: He is dosent none of the worlds best contender
Wessels: Eise and Steven are good friends (Steven dates Eise’s 11-year old sister which is custom here) and I am one someone’s cousin I think. Depends on how bad Clark’s memory is.
WesMcKinn: And you all just happen to be good. Sure…
Wessels: Well, Steven shows us lot of strategy and things. I show him too.
WesMcKinn: And Eise?
PaperBoy006: I can play teh goldeneyes u know.
Sterlin18: u guys know each other…that’s cool. none of my bros are that good cuz like we play on multi at my house sometimes and they’re like “dude your to good” cuz I always win 10-0 or maybe 10-1 but usnally not just 10-0.
WesMcKinn: I’m sorry guys, I just don’t see how you could be this fast. These claims seem laughable.
Wessels: Well do you know about the speed strafe?
WesMcKinn: What do you mean?
Wessels: Like, if you press walk forward and walk sideways at the same time you walk both but faster. Like, combined a bit.
WesMcKinn: Wait. That might just work. Like a vector sum….oh…my…God….
linkin skill: ye3
WesMcKinn: Be right back.
StevenZwartjes: Stop that Eise.
Sterlin18: funny that Wes don’t know about the strafe thing, I read it on his site I think
Wessels: Steven found out when we rented it.
WesMcKinn: Back. Man this is crazy…I think this IS actually faster!
Sterlin18: yea dude you didn’t kno about that?
WesMcKinn: This really changes everything. You guys might be telling the truth.
StevenZwartjes: You think? What do you think guys?
Wessels: So do you believe our times now?
WesMcKinn: Well, start shedding some light on some strategy and them maybe I’ll add you.
WesMcKinn: Sterling you’ve just been added.
Sterlin18: sweet, thanks :)
Wessels: Wait, aren’t you going to ask him for his strategy too?
WesMcKinn: Oh…well you see, he’s not Dutch. He’s American. He can communicate his ideas nice and clearly unlike suspicious foreigners like you three clowns.
Sterlin18: yea cuz we spek the same language and kno wut we mean when we say somethin cuz otherwise it would be hard to commnicate so that’s why probably, just guessin’ though
Wessels: Is my English bad? I try very hard at it. That doesn’t seem fair at all, Wes.
WesMcKinn: Yeah, well neither is playing 10,000 hours of GoldenEye only to discover you have to play everything again because of "speed strafing".
WesMcKinn: Congratulations Sterling, you’re our new champ by a mile.
StevenZwartjes: Not for long.
PaperBoy006: I eat food!
Sterlin18: Well, email me some time Steve and maybe we can share strats and stuff yeah?
StevenZwartjes has left the room. He will never be heard from again.
WesMcKinn: How is Steven so fast on Aztec agent?
Wessels: I think he has some trick there, he never told me.
Sterlin18: wut time?
WesMcKinn: *2:31 I mean. His other claims seem “reasonable” given this amazing strafing revelation.
PaperBoy006: I see Steven climb wall on Astec!
WesMcKinn: Ehh…I’m not sure how I feel about adding Eise.
PaperBoy006: vakkuu pipu
WesMcKinn: No Dutch, please.
Wessels: Nah, he’s good. You have my word.
Wessels: ...and that wasn't Dutch.
Wessels: It would appear that Eise keyed a random sequence of letters that have no logical origin.
WesMcKinn: Alright. Well it looks like the WGR is definitely about to see some change. Wait till I tell Glen….
WesMcKinn: That reminds me…that’s how the bastard has 0:19 on Bunker…the strafing thing. I’ll probably get 17 first try.
Sterlin18: don’t man needs lots of luck for 17
WesMcKinn: Glen can’t be that good.
GlenMcDiarmid has entered the room.
GlenMcDiarmid: I heard that.
WesMcKinn: Get back to your walkthroughs, slave.
WesMcKinn has kicked GlenMcDiarmid from the room.
“Stephen” has entered the room.
“Stephen”: Hi, I have 0:25 Runway agent
WesMcKinn: Are you American?
WesMcKinn: What’s your full name?
WesMcKinn: So be it. Congratulations, you’ve been added.
“Stephen” has “left” the “room”
Wessels: Ummm, I got to go now. Please treat the Europeans fairly.
CrashedTheTitanic has entered the room.
CrashedTheTitanic has left the room.
Wessels: Fine then.
Wessels: But be warned, Wes…do not doubt the Dutch.
Wessels: There is one greater than I coming. I am not worthy to unfasten the sandals on his feet.
Sterlin18: I thought u guys wore those wood shoes or somethin
Wessels: No. Well yeah.
PaperBoy006: *grinning like an idiot*
WesMcKinn: Okay, well thanks for that prophetic moment. But let’s just worry about emailing some strat stuff so I can catch Sterling. I mean so that I can validate you guys.
Wessels: Okay. Goodbye.
Wessels: C’mon Eise, we’re leaving.
PaperBoy006: I don't like you Jim !
Wessels has left the chat.
PaperBoy006 has left the chat.
WesMcKinn: Well Sterling, looks like the Neblett era begins. Think it will last?
Sterlin18: yea I guess tho it might not. depnds.
To be continued...
Chapter 3: The Age of ..."Limits"?
"The groundwork had now been laid what would become the golden era for the golden game. Wes and his boys quickly came to realize that when things truly become international, it's hard to compete. Wes already had his hands full in the management of the site, and his workload was getting ready to grow exponentially. Could he keep up with the demands of his labor of love? And how would he manage the influx of new gamers? And could he compete at the level of Sterling and Steven, or would he fall behind amid the rush of gifted newcomers? Meet these newcomers and relive the GoldenEye's golden era, as Sterling and Steven battle one another, and Wes battles's apathy...and...one of the Coe brothers, probably."
Written by Derek Clark
With contributions from Jon Barber