GREEN BAY, WI - The user name and password (ENTROPICDECAY, ZERO-TAU) were found to be useless because Jim Barrett touches himself at night. For so long it was unknown as to why Rare would put useless information in so visibly, but sources indicate that Barrett's nocturnal emissions are the reason.
This startling discovery has the entire Perfect Dark gaming world knocking at his door, begging him to stop his self gratification for the good of the community.
"It's a shame he can't control his primal, testosterone driven urges," commented Ian Fallens. "If he could just stop masturbating, we could finally solve this mystery once and for all."
It is unsure whether or not the ceasing of Barrett's self-inflicted sexual pleasure would make the user name and password useful.
"I don't think it would become significant if Jimbo stopped fidgiting with his nuts," stated Greg Lavery. "I mean, it's already been tainted. Perfect Dark has been around for 3-4 years, so it's doubtful it would work. I hope I'm wrong."
The Rare programmers were unable to be reached for comment. One question on everyone's mind is why they would program a user name and password that didn't do anything. Because that makes no sense, people had to look for the answer themselves.
"Everyone kept making stuff up about it," Randy Buikema said. "People on GameFAQs would say they got it to work, or gave all these B.S. reasons and stories about it. Little did we know the answer literally lied in Jimbo's hand. And, by answer, I mean penis."
Barrett was unwilling to comment on the matter that has caused him to be barraged with more flames than usual.
"Get the fuck away from me!" Barrett screamed. "It's not my fault...you'd touch my dick too! I mean, who would think that because I keep waking up stuck to my bed that this gay thing doesn't work?"
An unmarked van was parked outside of the Barrett residence to monitor the actions of Jim Barrett himself. While no masturbation was observed, the "round the clock" stakeout failed when MrFood and Steve Bryze argued over whether Anton Forsanders' computer art sucks or blows.
"We got into the third hour and I happened to mention Anton's artwork," Food explained. "I said, 'Man, does Anton's art suck, or what?' and Steve was all like, 'No, man, it blows.' I knew right then that the stakeout was essentially over."
