Clemens Finally Achieves a 44 in Super Metroid
Anybody who doesn't live under a rock which is everybody but Woody knows that Clemens has been going for a 44 in Super Metroid for quite awhile now. Over the weekend, David summoned the inner degen and finally completed a 44:51
which beat popular players like Oats, Sweetnumb and Krauser. The 44 is what separates the men from the boys, a step into the elite club. It is certainly an incredible achievement. With one of his true life dreams fulfilled, it seemed like David was more than prepared to pursue bigger and better things. Perhaps he could have moved to Europe with his girlfriend and chased his artistic dream to become a world-renown painter with his pieces being center stage at the most prestigious art galleries like The Louvre or the National Gallery in Prague. Or maybe he could haved climbed up the ladder in the Aldi business and broadened the horizons of the franchise to areas in Asia earning millions of dollars in the process. These all seemed very realistic for the young David Clemens but instead he decided to stick with speedrunning. Great. He claimed that he would steal the GE any% UWR and maybe even Facility agent 0:43. Then after these GE endeavors, he would learn the new route and get an even better time in Super Metroid. This was a decent idea but classic Clem is classic Clem. Played GE for a few hours and returned straight to Super Metroid not even bothering learning the new route. Fantastic. Good luck with passing Ivan and congratulations with the 44.
Pilotwings Rivalries Continue
Fluke "Luke" Szklarz gave his thumb a rest for Pilotwings in other words he gave up on Dark Cavern. So with his "thumb rest" he decided to see what other WRs he could cake. Luke went to Touch and Go searching for the bakery and struck gold. He became head baker and did business. The WR was lowered by almost 2 whole seconds to 42.94
. However, we all know Grav treats his emeralds on the rankings like they are his women, all his and in check. So Grav stormed into the bakery one night and usurped Luke's position as head baker with a 40.86
. Just like the last WR, this beat the previous by around 2 seconds which is just nasty. Nasty business.
On the other side of town, cakes were being done in the oven of Boss. 57.96
on Hawk Attack was done which beats the next best time by more than 10 seconds. Boss was not done though as he tore Meca Hawk Again apart with a 1:21.91
which also beats the next best by more than 10 seconds. Just when you thought he was finished doing business, he got a 1:51.70
on Ice Hornet beating the previous WR of 1:54.23
The Era of Pinball
With an established thread, PRs continued to pour in. The pinball council was also made and it arranged numerous meetings across the world which received a lot of media attention as expected. The big decision that had everyone on their feet was whether or not Axel Z's 13mil run needed to be taken down as it was unrecorded. Besides meetings, several late night phone calls were made and back and forth e-mails were involved as well. The council finally came to a consensus that for pinball to be taken seriously, we had to establish strict rules. Axel's 13mil was taken down and now Ryan "Woody" Lockwood has the Elite record of 10.9mil. However, Øyvind "Typosaur" Persvik entered the playing field with a run of 10.2mil coming close to the Elite record. This run attracted a lot of negative attention because he clearly stated that he just grinded the launch ramp until 10mil. What a waste of life. It seems to be some sort of European trend as some speculate that Axel Z might have used the same strat for his 13mil run. The next council meeting in Moscow, Russia will definitely hold some discussion regarding this issue. Some are ruminating over the idea of having separate European pinball rankings and rest of the world rankings. We'll just have to wait and see.
Philip "MirrorMage" Bezgoubov also completed a run of 9.9mil which puts him on the podium. What a gangster. A new category has also been introduced which is a speedrun to 1mil. The current elite record is held by Rayan "Perfectace" Isran with 1:23 but there has yet to be proof provided.
IamButtPixels achieved a 7:00.53
on Mario's Star which is known for unforgiving ball t-rolling. It remains the only individual level that is not sub 7 but still a great run from Pixels. From the man himself: "Only one or two bad mistakes, couple of clutch sets of RNG helped."
Victor completed a clutch 1:01:22
in the all courses category setting the new UWR. Congratulations to both Victor and IamButtPixels for their Mario Golf WRs.
The first WR of the week comes from Sammy "Clashingashes" Rodgers with an Archives 00 agent 0:54
which completes his WR sweep there. His first 300. The run was extremely smooth and a well-executed ending sealed the deal. Top players were reportedly sweating bullets about the likely prospect of Sammy picking up 0:53. However these rumors of the untied in the works were seemingly squashed as Sammy instead played Runway agent and caked 0:22
on a 5:0 run. The dark side doing wonders for the Chicago boy. Congratulations.
Moving on to arguably the most exciting WR to happen this week, we've got Runway secret agent 0:22
from Walton "Hotshott" Mattei. Just reading that sentence should have you more pumped than when Swompz got Depot 0:26. This time has only been achieved by three people including Walton. He had 148 0:23 completions, 3 0:22 fails and 2 0:22 runs that were ruined by the plane blowing up. This time also almost beats the entire top 10 excluding Bryan Bosshardt. You know you're gangsta when you've got a time that beats Ace. It should also be noted that the color combination we've got on the Runway SA initials is dope.
Right after he got the 0:22, I sat down with him for an interview over Skype. He started off by saying that I was lucky that he had time for a peasant like me. It's whatever. The interview goes as follows.
Please describe your 0:22 journey for me.
Well it all started in Birdie’s chat. The conversation turned to Runway SA 22. I popped my GE in, played some Runway SA trying to emulate Boss and Mouser and that same night I got the first 22 fail. It was a total fluke. No chance at completion but I decided that it was a goal, maybe a long shot but still a goal to shoot for someday.
Originally I played it for an hour every now and then, not really giving it my full effort. Was getting too frustrated. The only reason I got back into it was for January 23rd, Jimbo’s WR bounty. I played it for 17 hours that day over a couple of sessions, got the second 22 fail then. From there it was just putting all my effort in. Got some advice from various players, including Mouser and Boss. The last couple days I was getting many 23 completions, so I just went all in. As speed runners like to say, I finally got THE run. Took less than 30 hours.
Is there anything you enjoy about the Runway 0:22 in particular? Like how it beats Ace, only two other people have it or that you got it on English?
It just feels good to have it. It's definitely mostly skill with some RNG but it can be influenced. It's good to get it on my English cart since that’s where most of my times are gonna end up in. Plus there’s no confusion. It says runway, it says secret agent, it says 22.
Do you think the level is severely underplayed or do the rankings accurately show how hard the level is?
I think Ace called it “boring” and “tier 4” but there are many little RNG things to deal with. It’s definitely not for everyone but I think people will start playing it and hate it all over again once 23 starts losing more points.
Are you interested in going for the Runway 300 or is there some other level you'd like to play now? Or are you unsure at the moment?
Gonna chill for a bit. I still want to go for top 50. Runway 00 I will wait. The goal is 36 for now, I want to get an idea of how difficult it will be.
Now that you've shown you're better than Ace at this level, do you feel like you can overthrow him for the throne in the future?
I’m too old for this shit Kappa. But any time you can humble the gods, it feels good.
Now I know you're a true baller outside of the game but do you feel like this accomplishment has helped you in real life? Examples could include women, confidence, women, spiritual development and women.
At some point you just want to prove to yourself that you can still do it, even when you fail so many times.
But this has zero impact on real life. It is truly irrelevant in the grand scheme of things.
Are you sure?
I recall Woody telling me about how his Streets 1:12 slightly improved his sex life. I'm also aware of people becoming depressed as a result of lots of GE play.
Maybe for them impressionable girls, if you whip out a line like “I’m a world record holder” that’s ez money.
Do you have any inspiring words for your fans out there or any new players that aspire to be as cool as you?
For the next 24 hours… in the words of Aloe Blacc “You can tell everybody I’m the man, I’m the man, I’m the man".
Immediately after the interview he told me to get lost and promptly blocked me from Skype. I respect this, he's a busy man and he's got shit to do. You should also check out his extended version of 0:22 vid, it's really good. Congratulations!
Marc "Inkosidevinyl" Rützou called upon the ultimate truth to get Surface 2 agent 0:48
, a time no one would have expected Marc to get. Even Marc's poor eye for a run led him to believe that the run was a low 0:49 and not the WR. This is an insane point gain for the Dane especially at his ranking (24 pts whaaaat). This jump stepped all over Luke's hopes and dreams of returning to the podium but we'll see what Luke can do this year in GE. It seems like Marc is currently making a push for top 2 by playing top tier, Ace-approved levels like Surface 2 secret agent. However with turns wider than the skill level between Jimbo and Ace, it's unlikely he'll beat 0:55 even with the nade throw there. Congrats on the WR.
Austin "Austinthegamer" Perroux finally clutched a 0:53
on Dam agent. If you took all of the times Jimbo has ever complained about not getting a good trev on Facility, put it all into one audio file and checked the length, it would probably be the same length of time Austin put into 0:53. The run was very nicely done with a 1:0 but the reaction will probably catch most of the attention as he was very pumped and it showed how hype getting a WR can be in GE. Congratulations bud.
Alex "Carlvalho" Carvalho achieved Archives agent 0:16
. A 0:0 run so that's legit. A sketchy first room but solid strafing for the rest of the level kept the 0:16 within grasp. Alex was not done though as he continued his WR streak with a Bunker 1 agent 0:17
with a 6:0 run. A standard run with good RNG and good movement. Alex only has 2 more tier 4 agent WRs to go which should not be hard for the rapidly-improving newcomer.
Those were all the WRs but there have been some big PRs. Erik "Eric" Bond gave up on Depot secret agent and instead put the new strat to the test on 00 agent. He managed to cake a 0:48
... with the new strat. Old legends say that no person could ever go so slow to get a 0:48 with the new strat but Erik debunked these myths. What a champ. Hopefully he flukes a rocket shot and skips to 0:45. Congratulations.
Daniel "WodahsWalker" Coelho got a Facility 00 agent 0:54
which isn't too amazing these days but the run was a potential 0:52 pace until he got trolled and then got a bad trev. Hopefully Doak returns from vacation more often and Trev molests the bottles less frequently for the 0:52. Congratulations!
Ryan "Goose" White had started playing Frigate 00 agent ever since "G-day" in hopes of going big in the hostage casino. The planets finally aligned and the ball landed on black after a session of Mario Golf where Goose got a 1:09
. It's a great time especially while saving all hostages, it's even in the top 5 Frigate 00 agent times. The 1:09 also let Goose pass the mysterious Jimmy Bauer. While Goose clutched the run, the man we must thank is Twitch god, Kryzshenko. Ryan was not planning on playing Frigate that night but Kryzshenko insisted, he knew it was destiny. Kryzshenko is the guardian of the Twitch world. He lurks in the shadows of Twitch chats blessing runs with his divine powers. Some nights you might be having a bad sesh but just know Kryzshenko is omnipresent, he is always by your side guiding you to victory and happiness. So yeah mad shoutouts to our boy Kryzshenko and congratulations to Goose for the 1:09!
Other honorable mentions include Jonathan "dsx" Hotinski's Silo agent 1:05
, Alec "Troubleclef" McDonald's Silo agent 1:04
and Marc's 0:59 dupe
on Train agent (JAP UWR, wtf?!?).
*tumbleweed strikes again*
Not much has happened in the normal difficulties though Ludovic "Greenounet" Begon is closing in on the CI Defense agent WR. As usual, some serious business goes on in the lands of LTK/DLTK. Kyle "Flickerform" Wiebenga strengthened his Maian SOS sweep with 2:54
. Eric "Icy" Liikala used some scary strats to sub 5 Ruins DLTK with a 4:59
. Also, with his recent PR of2:07
on G5 DLTK, he became the new PD (D)LTK champ dethroning previous king, Bryan Bosshardt. There was also a surprise UWR from Axel Z who got 5:37
(first completion) on Escape DLTK exposing Icy's time of 5:39
as a joke. Congratulations to those mentioned especially Icy for being the new champ.
Oh what's this?
*tumbleweed returns for round 2*
In the States, Szklarz bought himself an NTSC SNES along with Super Metroid so he could annihilate Woody's current SM PR. In Australia, he attempted to start up the SNES with no sort of adapter relying on a miracle for it to work. With all the chips in the pot, there was no going back. The plug was in the socket, it was either going to work and Luke would get his sub 50 or it would be fucked and dreams would wither away before his eyes. Unfortunately there was nothing but echoes of silence and the harsh black persisted to hug the TV even after vehemently hitting the switch. Shortly after, a sinister, sly smoke escaped from the console and carefully creeped into Luke's senses. However, Luke thought nothing of it and went out to purchase a power adapter. The power adapter did not fix anything though. Something was fucked and Woody's PR would live on. However, while one door closes, another opens as Luke bought his new apartment. He is now truly independent and can now invite parades of women to his home. Congratulations!
The Elite hosted a NFL hall of fame 2015 prediction contest recently. Participants thought hard and long about who to pick. Some endured sleepless nights and some contacted analysts and experts to make good choices. With the Elite AIM chatroom all over the contest, it was obvious that someone no one has ever heard of would win the prize. The winner was very unexpected though. Erik would rack up the most points and collect the prize for himself. It's a major surprise because he knows nothing about the NFL but still beat all the fan favorites. Sources say that Erik just copy-pasted Invertigone's predictions. Some believe this and are very tilted about the sequence of events, "Meh. At least I did more than copy Alec's picks." We don't know what Erik did for sure but what we do know is that Erik is the Elite's NFL hall of fame 2015 prediction contest champion. Congratulations.
Quotes of The Week
Wodahsr: that joke died quicker than woody's ambition for the hitman WR
*talking about having a meet on Venus*
[5:22:03 AM] To Wave Race 64: but apparently every 2 days it gets 200mph winds kapap
[5:22:37 AM] (Channel) dsx: blows the console away before you get to see the timescreen
Any of Inky's posts this week